How do you know if it is the real thing? How do you know if you are in love? I’ve been thinking about that a lot lately. You see, I am in love for the first time in my life. When I married my ex in 1977 I was young, naive and thought I had to be married to make my life complete. I am glad I did because I have three great children and two grandchildren that I would not have otherwise. Life has forced me to examine my life. I am different now and had time to reflect, especially over the past two years. Now I know what I want and what I don’t want.
Love should feel good. Relationships that leave you feeling depleted, sad and making excuses are not based in love. I believed in the fairy tale ending. When reality set in I didn’t know what to do. The stories didn’t tell what happened to Cinderella when she woke up the morning after the wedding and the details of marriage began. I was clinging to the romance part of the story. I fooled myself into thinking I could make it all work but found I was stuck in a marriage that was never meant to last.
There is a peaceful quality to this love I have found that penetrates my inner core, touching a part of me that has always been there. When we are together, I am filled with warmth and a peace I have been searching for since I was a child. I don’t have to prove anything to him. He accepts me as I am and I can be myself at all times, no change required. He has helped me love myself and accept his love. When he looks at me, he truly sees me – I am not invisible anymore. I never felt my ex saw me. I didn’t feel accepted and deep down, truly loved. Today, I don’t feel anxious, needy or nervous. I am strong and this love I have has shown me that I am and always have been worthy of love.
I want to always feel this way but I know that life is change and there are no promises. I take one day at a time. Today I am loved, cherished, adored, accepted, and seen by the one I love. I am happy and in love for the first and hopefully the last time of my life. I have found the real thing and my search is over.
Love is the master key that opens the gates of happiness. ~Oliver Wendell Holmes
Wow, Vicki, I can't wait to meet him. I am so happy for you.
ReplyDeleteAnd you are correct. Love should be fun most of the time. Love should give you peace and clarity. Love should be supportive and affirming. Love shows respect, and does not always have to have its own way. Love is the willingness to discuss any problems and have joint counseling if needed. Love does not refuse to deal with difficulties. Love is surprising your love with a cup of coffee or orange juice to help wake up. Love tells each other often how much they are loved and appreciated. Love is quick to praise and slow to criticize. If criticism is needed, it is offered in a soft, tender, and loving manner. See Corinthians Chapter 13-Verses 4,5,6, and 7 Love you.
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